How to Decode Antique Automobile Advertisements

 

If It Says:

It Really Means:

Older restoration

Can't tell it's been restored

Rare model

Nobody liked them when they new either

One of a kind

Made it myself!

Needs engine work

It's been frozen for 30 years

No rust

Body and fenders are missing

No time to complete

I can't find the parts anyhow

Good investment

Couldn't depreciate anymore

Rough

It's too bad to lie about

Top good

Only leaks on rainy days

90 % complete

Just needs a body

Rebuilt engine

Has new spark plugs

Needs minor overhaul

Needs new engine

Completed many club tours

On a trailer

May run

But it never has

Lost storage

Neighbors getting up a petition

Uses no oil

Just throws it out

Needs interior

Seats are gone

Drive home

If you live next door

Best offer

About what I expect to get

29 coats hand rubbed paint

Took that much to cover the rust

Always driven slow

Won't go any faster

Prize winner

Hard luck trophy three times in a row

Ready for show

Just washed it

Stored for 5 years

Under a tree

Real show stopper

It's orange with purple fenders

Clean

It sat out in the rain yesterday

Easy restoration

The parts will come off in your hand

Drive it away

I live on top of a hill

Can be towed

Has four wheels........No tires

Drive anywhere

Within ten miles of home

Desirable antique

Nobody likes it but me

Extra parts

I finally gave up on it

Sharp

Whitewall tires

Need money

Found a better one

New top

Less than 5 years old

90% restored

It's been washed and waxed